Everyday seems to start off real nice and peaceful, you have great expectations of a beautiful day filled with rainbows and ponies like the wonder of a little girl. While getting your clothes out and makeup and hair all done to perfection you look in the mirror one final time and say ok I’m ready, lets do this.
Then something happens as soon as you get ready to walk out that door……it’s called life.
The kids are fighting, someone can’t find a shoe, you can’t find your keys, the dog has an accident on your rug cause no one let him out, you spill coffee on that outfit you just had looking great….ugh can you see yourself in this scenario?
You want to go back into bed and hide under the covers and scream for a bit and say calgon take me away.
Yes real life, it’s not a lifetime movie filled with everything we as women dream about as little girls.
Sometimes life is just messy, there’s no way around it but, we can allow it to happen around us but not let it happen inside of us.
How you ask?
By realizing that this is something that happens to everyone, you are not an isolated case, the world or God doesent hate you.
Once you know that you can learn to deal with each issue as it arises and not freak out.
I used to have so much on my shoulders all the time I should have been a circus juggler.
It just about wore me out but the effects of it really showed up years later as I continued to push through and be THAT girl that was told ” I don’t know how you do it all and look so put together” ?
I can now tell you from much experience that you can’t, it will catch up to you and when it does it’s like the snowball effect it will plow you over.
So here’s some of my thoughts to my former young self, and to you who are like me a do it all person, to keep yourself from falling apart and be live in peace.
1. Do not DO everything, delegate. Now that was and still is a dirty word to me. No one can do it right like me, and yes that is true especially if you are a person of excellence and detail. For your own sanity in your later years it really wont matter much, I promise. The kids never remember the amazing and sacrificial things you did for them and if you had no pictures you would not remember either. And believe me as the kids get older you are only as good to them as your last performance and they might hold something against you for life (one day when they are parents of grown children they might understand what they did to you, I know I did) and forget every other thing you did for them while you never did anything for yourself all those years, it’s not worth it.
2. Stop caring what other people think! I was always in front of people all my life and had to look just perfect at all times. I panicked if my kids were not being perfect or I was not all put together and not a mom of 3 or my house or car was not completely organized or clean. This here, just about knocked me out, well it did at many times and I had many a sleepless nights that I cried my way through it. The only one to care about is how God see’s you and how you see yourself cause in the end those are the only 2 who will be with you. No one else matters enough to make yourself sick over. Be at peace with yourself!
3. Take time to do nothing and think. WHAT???- Doing nothing to me meant lazy. I still have to renew my mind to the fact that it is ok to not be doing 2 things at once. I have never been lazy, I worked 2 jobs by the time I was 15 years old and have not stopped doing something to make money since. I never really had a teenage childhood that was spent “hanging out” . These days with my kids all grown and none living by me it seems like I still think I have to do do do when in fact I can rest, well sometimes I have no choice since fighting autoimmune diseases that bring me to a point of exhaustion sometimes over just going to the grocery store. So don’t just do something …….sit there and don’t feel guilty about it!
4. Choose Peace and Joy over being liked – Yes, You get to choose, you get to say NO I can’t do that because it will take my peace from me. You can choose to slow down your commitments to keep your joy because the joy of the Lord is your strength. You get to choose!!!! If someone else is doing the choosing for you well then you need to say something ( preaching to the choir here so listen up) and not be afraid of losing a friend because if you do then those are not the right friends to have anyway. Pray and ask God to bring those people that will add value to you and be a help rather than suck you dry. But, remember YOU get to choose so choose wisely.
I hope this helps you choose correctly for your life today, I hope you are not like me who had a Mom that said please slow down, you have too much on you, it will kill you and not listen to her because you had it under control well, on the outside but the inside was falling apart.
Save yourself before its too late and choose peace!
Did you find yourself somewhere in this blog, please let me know and comment below what you have changed through your own choice.
XO
Stacy
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